How to Avoid the Pitfalls.
EFT is one of the simplest and most powerful self help tools out there – but simple doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s easy to master.
So what are the top five mistakes and pitfalls that people fall into?
#1 – Not Using It!
‘Well duh’ I hear you say!
Yet how often have you felt stressed or overwhelmed and didn’t tap? And I’m including myself here! There have been days when I’ve looked back on a bad situation and thought “Why the hell didn’t I tap on that?!”
And I do it for a living!
The thing is EFT is quite new. I’ve used and studied it for the past 5 years – but before that I had no idea it even existed. Without revealing too much about my age, that’s a LOT of years of non-tapping conditioning.
It’s just not something that we’ve had as part of our daily routine. It’s not included in the list of things we do on a day to day basis.
There can be deeper reasons why EFT isn’t used – such as self sabotage, pyschological reversals or resistance to change – but more often than not it’s just simply forgotten.
If you find that this is the case just kindly remind yourself to use it. Maybe leave a post it up somewhere you will see it, as a gentle reminder that EFT needs to become part of your daily routine.
#2 – Being Too Vague
Specifics are key, but to start with it can pay to start with a global statement and by global I mean broad.
For example: “Even though I’m feeling upset right now, I love and accept myself.”
There are no specifics in this, it’s just a general ‘I’m upset’ statement.
This can get you going, but after a round or two of tapping on that it is very important that you start to hone in on the specifics.
Why are you upset right now? Maybe it’s because someone was horrible to you? In which case you would change the set up statement to “Even though I’m feeling upset right now because my partner was horrible to me, I love and accept myself”.
The more specific you can be the better EFT will work.
#3 – Missing Out Parts Of The Issue
We call these ‘aspects’ and a problem state could have many different ones.
Sticking with the “Even though I’m feeling upset right now…”, which then moved into the more specific “because my partner was horrible to me…” issue, some potential aspects of this might be:-
“I’m upset because he/she snapped at me”
[An Audible aspect]
“He/She gave me a really horrible look”
[A Visual aspect]
“My stomach twisted up”
[A physical sensation]
“I’m scared he/she will dump me”
[A fear of a possible future event]
“It reminded me of when my last boyfriend/girlfriend dumped me”
[A past trauma]
“This always happens to me”
[A limiting belief]
You get the idea.
Sure, you can stick with more generalised tapping statements – but these are unlikely to solve the problem and you’ll keep repeating the pattern.
It’s like peeling layers off an onion (not least because it may cause a few tears). By unearthing all the different parts or aspects and then clearing them is incredibly powerful and can last a lifetime.
#4 – Monitoring Your Progress
This can be a biggie – particularly if you’re working alone.
You don’t know if something is working unless you track your progress.
So before you start, think about the intensity of the feeling and give it a number between 1 and 10 – where 1 is “meh” and 10 is “argh!”
I highly recommend you write it down – along with the feeling.
“I’m upset because my partner was horrible to me” – 9
Then you tap.
The upset reduces but perhaps a new emotion came up. You write that down.
“I’m angry that they treated me that way” – 7
The anger changes to guilt.
“I feel guilty that I did something that made them so upset” – 6
Then you check back on the original feeling of upset. You barely feel it now, it’s moved to a 1.
The anger has dropped a little to a 5 – there’s something more there that needs tapping on.
Perhaps as you tap some old, traumatic memories pop into your head. Make a note of them. Address each one separately.
You get the idea.
It might appear overwhelming and confusing at first but when you get into the swing of it it’s easy. Recording it all on paper makes it easier still and allows you to monitor your progress and stay on track.
Another good thing about this is that all this takes time. By keeping a record you can put it down and pick it back up again at will.
Which leads me onto the final mistake…
#5 – Not Allowing Enough Time
We live in an age where we expect instant gratification.
Yes, sometimes EFT can work extremely quickly, but more often than not it takes a bit more sustained tapping to work through an issue properly.
You really want at least 10 to 15 minutes of tapping – without getting distracted or allowing yourself to give up too quickly.
That last point can be quite tricky when you’re tapping on yourself as sometimes our sub conscious intervenes when it thinks we’re going to get too upset. It will throw up excuses why you should stop tapping before the time is up – or maybe make you go blank. Acknowledge it and keep going until the time has finished. Maybe set yourself an alarm.
This is why working with someone else can be so beneficial, because they will keep asking questions when you may have given up.
Another way you can get round this is to follow one of my tapping videos – then you can simply tap along!
To tapping into your personal power!